Al Qaeda

From The Room: Divorcing Iraq

April 18, 2008 - Conservatives, and especially the neo-cons, got this sentimental idea into their heads that all Iraq needed was a taste of American-style freedom and all would be well. They thought, "Sunnis, Shiites--forget all that. Once these people get a load of us and what we're offering, they...

Live chat with al-Qaeda! Online now!

April 7, 2008 - Al-Qaeda's number two bad boy, Ayman al-Zawahiri recently released a 90-minute audio recording, beginning to answer the more than 900 questions submitted to him online since December. But why wait for the next recording to get your questions answered with Instant Messenger can serve the same...

Al-Qaeda #2 takes your requests!

April 4, 2008 - Way back in December, Ayman al Zawahiri, al-Qaeda's number two guy (we don't think they call it a Vice President), appeared in a video released by the terrorist organization soliciting questions from viewers. Yes, that's right, one of the world's most f...

Al-Qaeda's No. 2 drops a hot new solo project

March 27, 2008 - Al-Qaeda's marginally less smug version of Dick Cheney, Ayman al-Zawahiri, released a new audio tape this week, urging Muslims to wave their hands in the air (with machine guns). The almost five-minute long message urges followers to strike Jewish and American targets, in revenge for Israel...

Christianity 1, Islam 0 in Easter Mass matchup

March 25, 2008 - On Sunday, Pope Benedict baptized a Muslim writer, Magdi Allam, into the Catholic faith. The high-profile conversion took place at the Easter Eve Mass at St. Peter's Basilica. As converted Muslims are often targ...

From The Room: Bush to Sell Naming Rights to Iraq War

March 23, 2008 - President Bush commemorated the fifty anniversary of the Iraq War this week by winning the Only Person Who Still Thinks The Iraq War Was A Good Idea award. He shared the award with...

McCain: kill 'em all and let God sort 'em out

March 20, 2008 - Is John McCain's age starting to catch up with him? Earlier this week, the understandably befuddled candidate claimed that al-Qaeda members were being trained in Iran. But of all the outrageous claims made by the Bush administration, and Iran/al-Qaeda...

Osama to world: We're still touchy about pencil sketches, thank you very much

March 20, 2008 - Last month, Danish police arrested three Muslims for plotting to kill Kurt Westergaard, a Danish cartoonist. His drawings of Mohammed helped to set off a firestorm of violence and protest throughout the Muslim world. In a d...

From The Room: La-Z-Gates

March 11, 2008 - When asked today if the sudden resignation of Adm. William J. Fallon might mean the U.S. is one step closer to its inevitable invasion of Iran, Defense Secretary Robert Gates responded that the...

From The Room: GOP Delighted that Al-Qaeda Link is Not Gay Al-Qaeda Link

January 17, 2008 - Today the GOP reacted with pleasure to news that when former Congressman Mark Siljander received his indictment for aiding a terrorist organization he was not in...

From The Room: Meet the Press with al Qaeda's Ayman al-Zawahri

December 21, 2007 - Unlike George Bush, Al Qaeda seems eager to respond to questions from journalists, and is inviting them to submit questions to its No. 2 figure, Ayman al-Zawahri, the first interview of this type to be offered by the terror network since the 9/11 attacks. The advertisement appeared on...

Al-Qaeda's number 2 totally vlogs your questions!

December 17, 2007 - Ayman al Zawahri, al-Qaeda's number two, released a two hour video last week (not including bloopers and alternate scenes), at the end of which he asks Internet users to submit questions. He intends to answer the questions in his next video, even if the questions are negative or...

From The Room: Tickle-Me-Elmohammed

December 6, 2007 - Gillian Gibbons, a British schoolteacher, was jailed in Sudan last week for allowing her class to name a teddy bear "Muhammad." Convicted for blasphemy, angry mobs called for her to be caned and executed. Let's check our children's toys right now to make sure we have nothing offensive...

From The Room: What al Qaeda Wants for Christmas

November 15, 2007 - Hurray! Just in time for Christmas the FBI warns that al Qaeda is planning to attack malls. I can't wait for Al Qaeda Day Half off Sale at the Gap. At least if they attack, we'll catch them cause they won't be able to find their cars...

The world jihad of extraordinary gentlemen

October 24, 2007 - Six Muslim men were arrested in northern Spain today in a suspected plot to use the internet as a recruitment and training tool, organizing what they called a "world jihad." We've read enough comic books to know that there's no way to get a "world jihad" going without...