International

Tottering Cuban leader Fidel Castro annnounced Tuesday he's resigning as Cuba's president and commander-in-chief. On Sunday, when Cuba's [rubber-stamp] National Assembly meets, it's widely expected his 76-year-old brother, Raúl Castro, will be named as the country's new president.

But there are plenty of other options floating around the island if Raul decides he'd rather watch the clouds go by while chugging a nice glass of Metamucil. None of the potential choices may be as charismatic or windbaggy as Fidelito, but are any of them caliente enough for the job? Let's get to oglin'!