Odds that...

Whenever Hillary Clinton and her former campaign manager Patti Solis Doyle meet for coffee, their awkward hug turns into a headlock: 17-3

Roy Scheider, dead at 75, indulges the angels and tells them they're gonna need a bigger boat: 4-1

Paul McCartney's and Heather Mills' divorce hearing gets so ugly, they call Alec Baldwin for tips: 16-9

Microsoft, spurned once in its Yahoo takeover try, is going to work out every single day and get a hot new haircut: 8-5

Now that they've won their Grammys, Herbie Hancock feels vindicated, Kanye West feels jealous, and Amy Winehouse feels itchy: 1-1