As another Thanksgiving passes us by, Gabriel Delahaye gives you one more thing to be grateful for: a recap of the latest episode of Kid Nation.

You're welcome.

8:01: This week's episode is called "Let Me Talk." It's election season and everyone gets to make a speech. Zach (10-FL) goes first. It's no Daniel Webster's "Reply to Hayne," but it's better than Blaine's (14-FL) speech, which is "leaders should motivate, so, uh." Yes, Blaine, leaders should motivate, so, uh. Sit down, puppy.

8:02: Guylan's (11-MA) speech consists of a spazzy ripping off of his bandana and an enthusiastic, "Guys, please vote me off!" Done and done. I wish they could vote him off the island. Also, I wish this show was on an island. DK (14-IL) is the new Red District leader.

8:05: Jonathan "You'll Have to Pry My Career From My Cold, Dead Hands" Karsh chimes in: "You've heard all the candidates speak, and now it's your turn: VOTE!" I really wish that the intense dramatic music they're playing would run in our nation's polling places next November, but then again, I also wish that the way you voted was by playing laser tag with the candidates and electing the one who gets shot the least, so I'm probably not worth listening to.

8:09: By a landslide vote of 7-2, Greg (15-NV) beats the incumbent Anjay (12-TX) to become Town Council Rep for the Blue District. I don't understand why Anjay even wanted that position. Let's all remember that Olivia (12-IN) is in Blue District, carefully honing the craft of tearing people down to cover up the fact that she lives alone on a subsistence diet of Lean Cuisine and Crystal Light. You guys, I never knew the depths of hate one could have for a 12-year-old, but they're really deep depths.

8:10: Greg's acceptance speech: "I know a lot of you are thinking, Oh my god, Bonanza City is gonna burn. (long pause) I'm going to try and be the best Town Council Leader there ever was." I really wish he had said, "you're right," and doused everyone in gasoline. Laurel (12-MA) proclaims that Bonanza City is going to "crash and burn." Oh COME ON, LAUREL. Is it really that hard to read the pioneer journal and do what it says? Or to choose between clean clothes for everyone and a Pixy Stix party? I'm pretty sure if this Town Council had a conch, Laurel would have killed and eaten Piggy long ago.

8:17: Laurel and Sophia (14-FL) are talking about how horrible the new council will be. "I feel like someone just won the presidential election with no background check," Sophia says. Ugh. Look, I hate George Bush as much as the next enraged illiterate liberal blog commenter, but I will not tolerate political commentary from people who aren't even old enough to drink coffee.

8:22: At Blaine's suggestion, the town holds a "Respect Game" in the saloon, where everyone has to get up and talk, and if anyone in the crowd says anything, or giggles, then they have to start from the beginning. Halfway through, Natasha (13-FL) laughs, and Greg asks everyone to give a round of applause to Natasha for ruining everything. Eric (14-NJ) says "I don't think giving Natasha a round of applause because she messed up is the most respectful thing." Snap. Greg, this is what is called a "snap," and you just got it in your "face."

8:24: Greg and Blaine sneak up on the Green District bunk during a late night bitch session about the Respect Game and the new Town Council. In response to what they overhear, the next day Greg, Blaine, and DK set up chairs in the middle of the street in order to not work and just compliment people all day. Very quickly, things break down in a really intense way, including Sophia asking "What is this, a Nazi regime?" (Short answer: wow, no!) and Greg yelling "Bullshit!" over and over. Everyone is screaming. Maybe Bonanza City really will crash and burn. Drama!

8:39: SHOWDOWN. Because communication is the theme this week, the kids need to hoist pies up by a pulley system, then walk pies across a field on a balance beam, then slide the pies down a chute, and then dig through the pies for a buried picture of a method of comunnication (TV, phonograph), and then put those pictures in the order in which they were invented. You know, basic communication stuff.

8:41: Green District would have been Upper Class but they got the order of the inventions wrong, so Blue takes it. Green is Merchant Class. Yellow District would be the cooks except that Blaine thought television was invented before, you know, typewriters, phonographs, telegraphs, telephones, and radios. Jonathan Karsh tells him to reorder his pies, and he says "I hate you, Jonathan." Finally, some honest communication.

8:47: The town wins the reward, so they have to choose between ponies or letters from home. I'm pretty sure the Council will choose letters from home, but it would have been some pretty intense TV to watch those ponies slowly die from neglect as all the kids forgot they even had ponies two hours after they got them. I'd also like to take this opportunity to point out that everyone is covered from head to toe in pie. Gross.

8:53: Town Hall Meeting. Does anyone disapprove of the job the Town Council is doing? Yes, the entire Green District. The eavesdropping comes up. Greg asks anyone with a problem to say it to his face, and then starts yelling at everyone. More training on respect and communication from Greg. He should have his own show. It would be like Dr. Phil, but slightly more intelligent.

8:56: The gold star goes to Laurel. At first this makes me mad, because I hate Laurel. But then it makes me happy, because I love Laurel's mom. She says things like "whatasmatta?" and "yoo won twenty thousand dollahs?" She's basically Joe Pesci in drag.

NEXT WEEK: The kids of Bonanza City start their own school. Let me guess, it's called 40 Children Left Behind Elementary. But guess who doesn't want to go to school? Taylor. That's right, Taylor is still alive.