Chris Kelly

Bio

Mitt Romney Probably Won't Kill John McCain

You have to be at least a little comforted by the idea of making Mitt Romney John McCain's vice president. The Mormons did such a nice job taking care of Howard Hughes during his decline. So there's that.

(Hughes certainly appreciated their care. When he died, he left an...

John McCain Doesn't Know the Price of Gas/Can't Remember the Last Time He Bought Any

John McCain kind of stepped in it the other day, here in California, but luckily no one noticed. He was being driven from John Wayne airport to a fundraiser, and he took a quick call from Martin Wisckol of the Orange County Register. Wisckol asked him a series of softball...

John McCain Should Probably Stop Calling Barack Obama "Dr. No"

While John McCain is putting the country first with the best ideas from both parties, Barack Obama has become the Dr. No of energy, refusing to accept any idea that will contribute to solving America's energy crisis.

-- McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds

In addition to being the Dr. No of...

David Vitter Has a New Fetish

Fool me once, shame on -- shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again. -- The President of the United States of America

Why have gasoline prices doubled in a year? Demand hasn't doubled. Supplies are the same. I have this horrible feeling -- having lived through...

Prominent Democrats Back McCain

Prominent Democrats Back McCain
- Newsmax.com headline 6/15/08

I usually only read Newsmax for the non-prescription boner pill ads. ("Not only can I get it up, but I can also last for a while." -- Vialipro ®. "Leonard has a larger penis. There is no doubt...

Why Hillary Waits

We're told that when the Wehrmacht poured across the frontier, the first thing that froze was Stalin. As the news of the losses came in he, on a purely personal level, shut down. Closed up shop. Pipe on, but nobody home. Not what you're looking for in a...

Barack Obama's Vice President Will Be...

Just the other day (okay, a month and a half ago) I was having an off-the-record conversation with an extremely influential leader of the netroots community. How influential? Let me put it this way: Without him, there would be no Ned Lamont.

Given that triumph, we naturally wanted to know...

Governor Palin Has What it Takes to Be the Next Dick Cheney

Sarah Palin keeps showing up on short lists of John McCain vice presidents. She doesn't have a weird thing growing on the side of her head, so she brings that to the ticket as balance. She also has a few other obvious things going for her:

She's the Governor of...

Mr. Jenna Bush Gets a Piece of the Action

The White House would not comment, but the couple are expected to honeymoon in Europe. After that, they plan to live in a two-bedroom, two-bathroom townhouse in Baltimore's Federal Hill. She plans to return to teaching, and he will work for Constellation Energy. -- Associated Press 5/11/08

Did you...

Max Mosley's Sex Scandal: The Obvious Hillary Connection

Max Mosley is the president of the Fédération Internationale de l'Automobile, the governing body for Formula One racing. He's also been implicated -- and by "implicated," I mean "videotaped" -- in an unpleasant new British sex scandal involving concentration camp cosplay and getting whipped by hookers in...

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