Over the past year or so, I've listened to a lot of what so called "skeptics" say. I've heard them talk about psychics, cryptozoology, and most important of all, UFOs. One of the most prominent arguments against the existence of UFOs is that with a cover up of that size, the information probably would have come out by now. It makes sense in a blunt, honest sort of way, but who can really believe that? I think instead, we can be assured that the information not coming out, is just proof of a greater secret being kept by the federal government.

I don't know how many of you know this, but the CIA is currently subpoenaing a reporter for the New York Times, Jim Risen, in order to find out his source on the CIA leak and wiretapping scandals. Risen is one of the two reporters who opened up the story, making him one of the first reporters who has actually investigated something in about 30 years. Why is it that the CIA was unable to keep this information close to their vest? "Surely," some skeptics might say, "if they can keep the UFOs under wraps, illegally wiretapping their own citizens should be easy." What the skeptics don't realize is that there is only a certain amount of secrecy in the CIA's annual budget.

It's hard to classify things. It takes a lot of black markers and a lot of people keeping their mouths shut. If the CIA were to keep everything illegal and inappropriate they do under wraps, they'd never have any time for anything else. Sometimes, they have to let out a little thing about them illegally wiretapping American citizens and throwing their rights to search and seizure out the window. It's all to keep us from noticing the immense alien warlords that control the CIA from Roswell, New Mexico.

Obviously, aliens are on this planet. There's too much evidence not found for there not to be. That's not what's important. What's important is that maybe the CIA needs an increase in its budget for secrecy. They're wasting it all on UFOs. Perhaps that's why they're trying to SUBPOENA A REPORTER FOR CATCHING THEM ABSCONDING WITH AMERICAN LIBERTIES. They want to show us that they need more secrecy. They need to be able to hide things like MAKING OFF WITH OUR LIBERTIES because if they can't, a few folks out there may just GET UPSET and start saying things like, "IF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT DOESN'T DO THE JOB IT'S SUPPOSED TO DO, THE PEOPLE HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY TO CHANGE THE GOVERNMENT." There's some rumblings out there, or so I've heard.

Look, the point is--don't get too mad at the CIA for trying to hide their gross abuses of us through legal proceedings. They're just trying to hide our alien masters from us more, and that's what to keep us safe. After all, we wouldn't want a panic from people learning that the CIA has already confiscated from our alien masters their favorite cookbook.