This week in How to Use and Enjoy Logical Fallacies, we'll be looking at popular Florida lawyer, John "Jack" Thompson, in a feature I like to call "Making a career from mistaking correlation for causation." As we all know, the correlation/causation fallacy occurs when we take events that have two or more traits and then say that one of those traits caused the other. For example: I wear red sneakers and have never been hit by a car, therefore red sneakers stop cars from hitting you. Jack Thompson is a pro at using this fallacy, and we're going to see how he does it! Get out your notebooks, kids, it's time to study from the master!

In the wake of the horrible tragedy that was the North Illinois University shooting, Jack Thompson bravely stood up and said he knew what had caused the problem: the video game Counter-Strike. In order to prove it, Thompson sent a threatening letter to the head of NIU, demanding that he be allowed to search the killer's room to find the evidence he decided would be there. This leads us to our first lesson: In case of tragedy, bully your way in.

Jack has made a whole career noticing that a lot of people who are violent also happen to play video games. Even though no evidence has shown a direct link between the two, when using logical fallacies: Don't let the facts bring you down.

He's had a storied career, fighting with everyone from Rockstar Games to 2K and now to Microsoft. And what's even better, now he has help! Help from Lyndon LaRouche, the political activist/nut whose site today is suggesting that people look at LaRouche's 2007 pamphlet, Is the Devil In your Laptop? Rule number 3: Always exaggerate your claims to the most illogical extreme.

The great thing about correlation/causation is that it can be used to justify whatever you want. I myself try to use it whenever building a bogus argument. For example, in my first post on 23/6, It's Not Your Freedom, It's Our Freedom, I stated, "Think about this for a second. What do Osama bin Laden, Ted Kazinski, Mao Zedong, Joseph Stalin and Charlie Manson have in common? The FBI was unable to read their emails." See how easy it is? None of these guys had the ability to write email, there being no internet at the time, but by placing our true inability to read their emails alongside their horrendous crimes, I'm able to justify a complete disrespect for privacy.

What Jack and Lyndon understand is that correlation/causation is great for fear mongering. See, our brains are hardwired to find patterns. Have you ever seen a face in wood grain? Everybody has. It's an evolutionary trait that lets us recognize faces from an early age. We look for correlations, and correlation/causation allows people like Jack to use the fallacy in connection with Fox News to get his mug out there and tell the world that Gamestop and Electronics Beutique are trying to murder their families. Thompson's been able to turn the fallacy into a near 20-year career that has done such things as make sure that Ice-T was kicked off the Time Warner label, putting out a really stupid word for video games, "Murder Simulator" (dumb because according to people who actually design real "Murder Simulators" for army use, Grand Theft Auto is possibly the worst one you'd ever find), and generally thrust himself into the spotlight of conservative scare mongering news all over the country.