This year's primary season has been going on for more than a year now, and both the analysts and candidates have realized that there's really only one way to describe the unprecedented, ongoing horse race of the campaign: tortured sports metaphors.

After the February 26 debate in Cleveland, Keith Olbermann explained why neither candidate was able to win decisively: "This looks like a bunch of field goals, not touchdowns." Chris Matthews responded: "I think we learned tonight why Americans like high-scoring sports. This was a low scoring game, perhaps like a hockey game." Then, in his withdrawal speech, Mike Huckabee compared himself to baseball Hall of Famer George Brett, who wanted the final at-bat of his career to be a routine groundball out, so that he could teach a lesson about hustling on every play.

We've got another eight months till November, sports fans. Get out a shot glass and a case of Pabst, and curl up to the wall-to-wall coverage, on the off chance you might hear a metaphor that Wolf Blitzer didn't think of first. Here are a few possibilities:

Candy Crowley: "The bass haven't been biting because Fred Thompson hasn't been fishing with nightcrawlers. He's been fishing with gummi worms, and the voters know it."

John King: "Mitt Romney's offensive line really let him down in Iowa, Wolf. By my count, his advisers missed at least three tackles, and Romney got flushed out of the pocket early and often. He ate turf the entire night."

Anderson Cooper: "It's been almost two weeks since the primary, and the winner in New Mexico is still unknown. If the state were a pinball table, it would be a tilt. Both candidates are looking for an extra ball."

Chris Matthews: "John Lewis just put a little masse on his former endorsement of Hillary Clinton and instead hopped into the pocket for Obama. Hillary nearly snapped her cue over her knee when she heard."

Paul Begala: "Barack Obama's reaction to Canadagate was a moving screen, and it was only a matter of time before Hillary blew the whistle and called an offensive foul. But she missed the first free throw, and Barack has been much better at boxing her out on rebounds."

Bill Bennett: "Lou, Hillary went into Ohio and Texas needing to salvage a 7-10 split, and she'll still need a strike in Pennsylvania. Fortunately, it's a strong union state."

Keith Olbermann: "Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are deadlocked like a WrestleMania main event. Hillary's 3 A.M. ad was her attempt at a Stone Cold Stunner, but Barack Obama's deflected it with a brilliant People's Elbow of a response. Neither one has been able to throw the other into the turnbuckle, but I doubt the folding chairs and picnic tables near the ring will stay intact much longer."

Lou Dobbs: "Last summer, it looked like John McCain was down to his last checker. But he got to the back rank, kinged himself, and triple jumped Rudy Giuliani, Mitt Romney, and Mike Huckabee, and now he's the Republican nominee."