My roommate and I agreed that last night's episode had the most moments of contemplation and the least action of any Hills episode to date, and that the best episodes of the series were definitely the ones in which Spencer had just been introduced and we got to watch Heidi get manipulated by him, while Lauren forced her way into the middle. That was a great second season, and that's when The Hills really took off as a Rolling Stone cover-worthy cultural phenomenon. The cast is finding it harder to have real interactions as rich kids new to L.A. because everyone now knows them as rich kids from The Hills, magazines and gossip sites are reporting on the show's events before they make it on air, and the sense that if it's not that real, but not that fake, then maybe it's not worth watching, which begs the question: has The Hills peaked?

In last night's episode, the scenes between Spencer and SpencHER were good--probably just because we get a new character in Stephanie Pratt, and their sibling squabbles seem pretty realistic ("this is how bread goes stale, Spencer"). But, the Lo vs. Audrina feud? No one cares! Heidi hanging out with her bosses in Vegas? Eww, no. The girls bought a puppy? Lame. They might as well have gotten a little kid like shark-jumping sitcoms (Growing Pains, Married with Children) have in the past.

Now that we all know The Hills is, if not totally scripted, totally manipulated by producers, I think the only way to save it from a lackluster fourth season is to go all out. Jason Gay, the writer of the Rolling Stone article, notes that The Hills is a soap opera without any soap opera drama. Well, bring on the drama!

Some ideas:

Lauren hooks up with Spencer. You'd LOVE it.

A diehard Hills fan stalks the gang. Points if it's revealed to be Elodie from Season 2.

Lauren gets a boyfriend, then oddly starts telling herself that she needs to get rid of him or else. It's revealed that Lauren has a split personality whose only function is to judge.

Plastic surgery princess Heidi is actually the evil twin of the real Heidi, who returns to the show with a normal face and chest. Spencer has to choose which one he really loves!

They get a second puppy, and the first puppy totally hates it. Spinoff: The Hills: Hills' Dogs in the Hills.

Whitney gets really bitchy.